We I had the opportunity to review a physical copy of Love, Honor, and Virtue: Gaining or Regaining a Biblical Attitude Toward Sexuality from Great Waters Press.
I have been living on Earth for many years and am amazed at how much society has changed during that period of time. It is to the point where so many of the values we once held are considered prudish, sexist and bigoted. An example is, it is all right for women to bare it all and if a man looks, he is at fault. If a man behaves like a man (ex: shows courtesies to a woman, etc.), he is deemed sexist.
That is the world our sons are growing up in and as a mother of two boys, it is challenging when trying to teach them to correct way for them to conduct themselves. Temptation is no longer limited to the adult book store hidden off of the side of the road. It meets young men in their homes through television, the computer, cell phone and even during casual conversation with their peers.
Unfortunately, none of us are safe from temptation and it is getting harder every day.
As a Christian, I want my sons (and daughter) to be equipped as they navigate through a world that has lost an understanding of love, honor and virtue and how to live by their Christian values when that is challenged.
Hal and Melanie Young know what it is like to raise boys (children) as parents of six sons and two daughters. I was first introduced to their writing with Raising Real Men. They have a wide variety of products, Books for Parents and “stuff” that boys like. We always visit their booth at convention and guess what? There are boys and their parents everywhere surrounding their booth. They have good advice for raising sons, but also for just raising children.
Love, Honor, and Virtue: Gaining or Regaining a Biblical Attitude Toward Sexuality is a great big title for a whole lot of issues our sons are confronted with every day. The book is only 96 pages long, could be a quick read, but is best that it is not. There are seven chapters (and an Introduction):
1) To the Young Man on the Battlefield
2) Sex Was God’s Idea
3) It’s All Connected
4) The Enemy Perverts God’s Design
5) How Can a Young Man Keep His Way Pure?
6) Recovering From a Fall
7) Guys and Girls
8) The Road Ahead
Each one of these chapters walks the reader through a journey of self-discovery in God’s eyes of how He desires them to live their life as they journey through the battlefield against the enemy. The enemy is out for their soul and if a male has no understanding of the value of sexual purity, he may be easily taken down in other areas of his life and lose focus of his purpose. You may read a sample. Hal and Melanie use biblical references throughout the book, which reinforces Christian values and equips young men with the tools they need to come out victorious.
Love, Honor, and Virtue is written for young men (over the age of 18), teens and children, and I would say parents of boys (. . . and of daughters). Although it is written about boys, the content is best to be read by older teens and adults. Tough issues are discussed. Although Hal and Melanie write from a biblical perspective and truth, they do not mince their words, and they should not. The issues (the kind that make many uncomfortable) they discuss are serious and ones that are affecting our sons. The Youngs use the Introduction to share why they wrote the book and its purpose.
I love that the book opens with the chapter that states, Sex Was God’s Idea. Sex is beautiful, divine and awesome, and was created by God. Knowing that definition immediately eliminates much confusion. This chapter gives the reader great insight into the direction the book is going to flow. I can see it as a make or break as far as whether or not one will continue reading. Some of the points that are made are:
Sex and Gender are God’s Original Design
“He created two humans in two genders which are central to fulfilling His purpose in creating them” and uses scripture to validate the statement.
God Created Marriage for Many Purposes
Along with populating the Earth, God has a purpose for marriage. He created Woman as a “helper, companion and friend” for Man.
Women are not God’s Plan B. Society tries to convince us that God dos not value women, but He does.
Some other highlights from the book:
In It’s All Connected (chapter three), The Youngs further share examples that God is not the author of confusion and has a purpose/reason for everything, and they show the connection. Boys and girls were purposely created differently, which is determined at birth. Some of the most difficult challenges occur during the teen years when “hormones are flowing” and changes are happening physically and emotionally. Teens are questioning things like who they are (value and purpose, Christian or not, etc.), what they are (ex: male, female, neither or other) and self-expression (ex: acceptable boundaries – or none at all – as to how much is too much to share?).
Sin, Hook-ups, Gender-bending, Porn
“Our sexual drive is remarkably strong, and it can become overwhelming if we give it free rein.
Giving Up and Giving In
“I was the only person at the table who had two biological, married parents.”
Some of the other issues that are shared in this chapter are the increasing rise of pornography (not a victimless crime), infidelity, sexting and pre-marital sex. The Youngs even address masturbation. You will have to read the book to learn their take on that issue.
After reading about all of the challenges our boys face, Hal and Melanie do give readers hope in How Can a Young Man Keep His Way Pure? (chapter four). The five point defense: leave, pray, read, sing and go (more details are in the book) are wonderful tactics. Other suggestions are support and accountability partner, and software tools to use on electronic devices.
Even when you find yourself Recovering From a Fall (chapter five), because it could happen, it is still possible to lead a life of love, honor and virtue. I like that Hal and Melanie add this chapter to encourage those who have difficulty. Basically, don’t give up in the battle. Keep pushing through:
Put on your armor and prepare again for battle by breaking the chains:
“A huge growth in the number of young men coming in who have discovered after indulging for some time in porn use, they can’t respond to a woman normally.”
Set a new goal, make a new plan and get in the battle again!
I like how the book is laid out. The chapters are not long and each one concludes with a summary of what you read. Love, Honor, and Virtue: Gaining or Regaining a Biblical Attitude Toward Sexuality is not a long book, but it is not a quick read. Think about everything that makes you uncomfortable about sexuality. Hal and Melanie discuss everything, so make sure you are ready to read what they have to say.
I love the autographed copy of the book I received. That makes it special and is a book I will definitely keep. Love, Honor, and Virtue: Gaining or Regaining a Biblical Attitude Toward Sexuality is like a handbook that you will find yourself referring to for the reminders.
Read a review of No Longer Little: Parenting Tweens with Grace and Hope
PRICE AND AVAILABILITY
You may purchase Love, Honor, and Virtue: Gaining or Regaining a Biblical Attitude Toward Sexuality.
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